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Thursday, November 6, 2008

Thanks, Random White Guy!

Image credit: Photo by
soundfromwayout on Flickr
Licensed under Creative Commons

"Have you," Mark asked me after the kids went to bed last night, "had strangers coming up to you and congratulating you today?"

"Um, no," I said.

But of course I didn't. I'm white. Mark is black. And it seems lots of white people, giddy with the seeming end of racism marked by Obama's ascent to the presidency, thought they should give black people, represented in the form of my husband, a big friendly thumbs up. So, they congratulated Mark. On the street. In halls of office buildings. At fast food restaurants. Even (yes, it's true) at the urinal in a public restroom.

"I guess," said Mark, "These people are reaching out in solidarity. I guess I should appreciate the gesture, accept the congratulations from all these total strangers and say, 'Thanks, random white guy!' but instead I just feel weird."

Welcome to the brave new world. It will still take some getting used to for all of us.
Posted by at 12:00 AM
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17 comments:

  1. How strange that must be! I suppose congratulations is better than hostility, but still. What the heck do you do that with?
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  2. I know I have been giddy with excitement - I have forwarded emails about Obama to people I normally would not - because I did not know where they stood - but in the past 24 hours - I did not care where they stood, only that change is good and I wanted to celebrate the opportunity America has for it!
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  3. It is a form of solidarity I think. And an acknowledgment of progress, a great deal of progress. It all makes me feel good.
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  4. Karen Maezen MillerNov 6, 2008 01:27 AM
    Weird until we see that it's still the same world.
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  5. Stagnant ArtistNov 6, 2008 02:04 AM
    i think it's progress. It's the idea that we all have stood up to the bully that got us all in trouble for 8 years and put the right person in. I am so proud of our country for making these steps. Living in a city, I kept overhearing from people saying that they never thought they would get to see this happen in their life, and I think a amount of us thought that too. It's breaking down those color barriers. Hooray for progress. Thanks random white GIRL, asian guy, latino guy, indian guy, etc. this just means the wall has been broken and we all have a chance!
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  6. Sophie in the MoonlightNov 6, 2008 02:12 AM
    I think everyone's excitement runneth over. I felt like singing Ding dong the witch is dead on Tues. night. Bush is leaving in 74 days... FINALLY! In the meantime, the world rejoices that we have taken a wonderful step forward by choosing Obama.

    I just had the funniest image in my mind. The famous photo of the nurse and the sailor kissing in Times Square when Germany was defeated and everyone danced in the streets. They didn't know one another, they were just overcome by joy. My silly brain is picturing Mark in the same (sort of) position. People running up to him and embracing him, patting him on the back, sharing hope and joy. Well, at least they aren't swooping him off his feet and planting one on his kisser. Awk-Ward! =)
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  7. That's totally weird, going up to someone you don't even know and congratulating them. I live in a predominantly black neighborhood and when Obama won, everyone was out in the streets going crazy. My husband and I went out and joined our neighbors, but we didn't go up to each person and congratulate them--it felt like something we were ALL a part of.
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  8. It is kind of sad though that they are all assuming that he voted for Obama. If the color of his skin is irrelevant then why assume he voted that way? That kind of sets us back again.
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  9. Mary P Jones (MPJ)Nov 6, 2008 03:53 AM
    Pam, that's very much part of what made him uncomfortable. Mark is not very into politics, and while I'm certain he voted for Obama, he wasn't a huge, enthusiastic supporter. He also has a great deal of respect and admiration for McCain and has always stated (to me) that he'd be perfectly happy with a McCain presidency.

    People are making an assumption about his feelings based on his skin color. In some ways that assumption is correct, but in others it's very off base.
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  10. My name is Ken and I'm a sex addict.Nov 6, 2008 05:21 AM
    Not at all the same thing, but your post reminded me of the treatment the members of the military received in the months after Sep 11.

    I was also congratulated/thanked at a public urinal (in uniform). The similarity struck me as funny.

    I appreciate the well-hidden link to "stuff white people like!"
    I LOVE that site!
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  11. Mary P Jones (MPJ)Nov 6, 2008 06:37 AM
    The thought of strangers thanking people at public urinals seems so bizarre and funny to me.

    And I'm glad you caught the link/reference, Ken. Those moments my husband experienced seemed very much like Stuff White People Like. ;)
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  12. Addicted RantingsNov 6, 2008 11:34 AM
    I was once arrested for carrying on a conversation with someone in a public restroom. Luckly she dropped all charges.

    Ps, White people are such nerds!
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  13. Mary P Jones (MPJ)Nov 6, 2008 12:15 PM
    AR, If I had known about you then what I know now, I wouldn't have dropped them. Next time I'll totally press charges!
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  14. Hilarious! I didn't know that people were doing that. Is it happening all over?
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  15. Mary P Jones (MPJ)Nov 7, 2008 02:33 AM
    I don't know, Headless Mom. I'll have to ask around to see if congratulatory white people are a trend!
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  16. I don't see myself doing something like that. We're all in this together (or maybe not) but I am just as much a part of this history as the black community or any minority. I voted Obama for reasons that had nothing to do with him being black. He just happens to be black. Once he was voted in then it is time for us all to recoginize that we voted in our first black president. WE....
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  17. My husband and I were just talking about this! Neither of us white folk are actually congratulating black folk we meet. But we both admit to being more comfortable saying milder things like, "Some election yesterday!" to black people we find ourselves standing in line next to at the bank, etc.

    This is partially a matter of pure statistics: African Americans voted for Obama in unprecedented numbers so the chances are great that we voted similarly.

    But also I remember how I felt seeing Hilary at the primary debates and how much it meant to me that someone who looked like me got that close to being President. Shallow, perhaps, but I assume that most African Americans - even if they aren't particularly enthused about Obama as a candidate or person - feel a little bit of something about him winning.
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