Stop Calling Me Codependent!

In a recent discussion over at the Junky's Wives Club, The Junky's Wife commented that we need a better label than "codependent" for codependents. After all, I haven't met a codependent yet who doesn't hate that label. It just sounds so weak and awful.

So few months ago, I took a personality test and was told I am a "Helper" (read: codependent). Then today I took another personality test that storyteller linked to from Sacred Ruminations. The results? I'm a "Nurturer" (read: codependent).

Hi, I'm Mary and I'm an insanely helpful super-nurturer. Yep. I like that label better.

You Are 2: The Helper

You always put on a happy face and try to help those around you. You're incredibly empathetic and care about everyone you know. Able to see the good in others, you're thoughtful, warm, and sincere. You connect with people who are charming and charismatic. At Your Best: You are deeply giving, altruistic, and humble. You devote your life to others while caring for yourself too. At Your Worst: You are manipulative and enjoy making other people guilty. Your Fixation: Rejection Your Primary Fear: Being unworthy of love Your Primary Desire: To be loved unconditionally Other Number 2's: Mother Teresa, John Travolta, Princess Diana, Dr. Phil, and Mr. Rogers.

What Number Are You?

Results The four aspects that make up this personality type are: Summary of Nurturers Care for the important people in their lives Strive for harmony and avoid confrontation Think of themselves as gentle, conscientious, and mature May have trouble making decisions that could hurt others More about Nurturers Nurturers are quiet people who believe in order and diligently look after the people they care about. They focus on the needs of others and establish routines to help them meet their commitments. Nurturers are the most likely group to say they prefer a job where the same thing happens every day, according to a UK survey. Nurturers remember details that are important to them, such as their friends' birthdays and anniversaries. People with this personality type value others' feelings and may challenge behaviour they think is insensitive. In situations where they can't use their talents or are unappreciated, Nurturers may feel bitter and seek support by complaining to their colleagues. Under extreme stress, Nurturers may become preoccupied with the worst possible outcome and believe that they are heading for disaster. Because they are so caring and loyal, Nurturers run the risk of being taken advantage of. Nurturer Careers Nurturers are often drawn to jobs that allow them to help others. It's important to remember that no survey can predict personality type with 100 percent accuracy. Experts say that we should use personality type to better understand ourselves and others, but shouldn't feel restricted by our results. Overall results The graph below shows the percentage of people with each personality type out of everyone who has taken this test. Big Thinkers Counsellors Go-getters Idealists Innovators Leaders Masterminds Mentors Nurturers Peacemakers Performers Providers Realists Resolvers Strategists Supervisors

Human body homepage The mind homepage Psychology tests Spot the fake smile What's your millionaire potential? Sensation-Seeking Careers test Morals test Disgust Reading faces 1 Reading faces 2 Interactive lonely hearts ad Interactive body Brain map Facts and features Personality type Flavour and personality Moral maze Seeking perfection Brain Psychology in sport Personality tests and job interviews The British Psychological Society Relate Myers Briggs OPP: Personality at work The BBC is not responsible for the content of external websites.

Read about the 16 personality types from the What Am I like? Personality test:

Big Thinker,Counsellor, Go-getter, Idealist, Innovator, Leader, Mastermind, Mentor, Nurturer, Peacemaker, Performer, Provider, Realist, Resolver, Strategist and Supervisor.